Somewhere a small quarrel has begun~

"Somewhere a small quarrel

has begun, a few overheated words

ignite a conflagration,

and the smell of smoke

is on its way;

the smell of war."

In her poem, "Somewhere in the World", Linda Pastan writes about how somewhere in the world, there is something that will destroy everything, especially everything that holds or symbolizes happiness. This 'something' has made Pastan paranoid, as throughout the poem she expresses how she constantly 'knocks on wood', 'rinses her hands', and 'invents alarm codes'.

However, two particular stanzas caught my attention. While most of the poem describes a force that is unseen and unstoppable (such as a virus or a cold front), a 'quarrel' is something that humans have to start, but also have the power to stop. Often a 'small quarrel' could be worked through by sitting down and discussing the point of conflict. With self control and a mutual desire for resolution, a quarrel does not need to give way to a war. But, a quarrel that turns into a fiery fight can definitely steel and ruin happiness. It is hard to see that we, ourselves as humans, can be the demise of our own joy-- It is easier to assume that a force out of our control will break our spirits, and assuming this would leave no room for regret, since the destroying force would be out of our control, and there would be nothing we could do to stop it.

More than a cold front and more than a virus, a quarrel that is not stopped from escalating can ruin happiness. Not only does it take away joy from a person, but it also takes away the desire for peace within a relationship, as feelings get hurt and harsh words are said, often neither person wants to forgive the other. Such a quarrel later turns into guilt- guilt for not understanding, guilt for not trying harder to reconcile, guilt for arguing over something 'small' in the first place. This removes happiness in a different sense. Instead of replacing it with animosity and hurt and anger, it replaces it with sorrow and regret. Sometimes, all it takes is something small can take away the greatest things in life- and those small somethings were completely under our control.